Welp, my darling Reader, the time has finally come. I woke up two mornings ago and realized I wouldn't be offering The Great Pleasure Challenge again. Something has been in the process of shifting over the last few weeks and whatever mysterious mechanism at play in my body and my energetic field made its last incremental move and clunked into place with a visceral thud.

My response surprised me a little: "Huh. Okay."

And then I got up and made myself some coffee.

I loved the Challenge so much and I've loved getting to ferry my beloved, intrepid participants across that wild Styx. I have some things I'd like to say about what I think about pleasure and how I feel regarding the way it's employed and engaged with in the regular world. And I will probably say some of them but I don't want to give the impression that this decision is largely dictated by the prevailing and limiting way pleasure is pigeon-holed into the realm of sexual functions.

The real reason the Challenge is over is because my body says so. And I listen to my body. And I trust my body.

I haven't found a better word for it, but pleasure is the tool I use to connect with what is true for me. That physical sensation of rightness that comes from hitting the spot ("hitting the spot" in whatever way is spot-hitting in the moment: sitting in the sun, breathing in damp morning air, crying with friends, laughing alone) guides me. It feels like a thick cord that runs from my inner most self straight to the core of the earth. Pleasure the way I've been teaching it serves an efficient multidimensional function wherein it both connects me to my body and inner wisdom as well as filling my cup and providing me with soft places to land in my life. It helps me slow everything way down and allows me to make clearer decisions while helping to regulate my nervous system and just fills my life with more delight and loveliness in general.

Pleasure is also the physical expression of "yes" and "no" in my life.

Recently I was listening to a podcast where two men who are much admired were discussing the ills of society and the topic turned to pleasure. Dopamine detoxes are all the rage on social media these days (I don't know if you've seen) and they were weighing in on the dangers of living ones life according to chasing the dopamine rush. One of these esteemed dudes suggested if people could just shift from pleasure to enjoyment then all would be well and they'd achieve so much more happiness.

My complaints about this concept are mostly semantical and even though I would have LOVED to be in the room during that discussion - gently clearing my throat before offering a different perspective - I can appreciate using "enjoyment" as a substitute. It doesn't quite scratch the itch for me, though. I choose pleasure rather than "joy" because it's the body-level experience of contentment that I'm always trying to convey. I choose pleasure rather than "liking" because the problem I see a lot of people having (that I've had myself at different times) is how stuck we can be in our idea of right and wrong and good and bad rather than feeling in our bodies what is good and bad or right and wrong on an individual, immediate level.

"Pleasure" - I believe - is what helps bring our values into flesh. We live from our bodies. We are our bodies in the world. Our bodies house our spirit as we conduct the business of being alive. Concepts of "right living" don't do us much good. But our bodies will tell us when we're out of step with ourselves. Our bodies will tell us where and when we need to make adjustments.

I've had some experiences recently that have brought me closer to how other people are using the word pleasure. There are coaches, a whole industry, wellness influencers, tantra teachers etc who have a very different approach and it gets tricky when we're using the same terminology, meaning very different things. All of these have their place and lately my body has been saying "fuck no."

I see my work as collective liberation work. That's what I care about. I want there to be more free, kind, ethical people running around the world, jailbreaking their fellows, advocating for justice and the spiritual advancement of humankind. Those are my marching orders and I don't see it happening in the circles that are using pleasure as a way to achieve personal liberation through relentless pursuit of the feel-good.

So, things are going to be shifting over here. I have some ideas about what's next and I hope you'll stay tuned. as always I deeply appreciate your presence and existence on this planet and in my life.

xoxo

Amelia